11-18-2004, 08:51 PM
:lol: Thanks skippy, that was great! :lol:
Watch out Gord! Here comes Britney
11-18-2004, 10:15 PM
skippy the wonder dog Wrote:Kill me now, before I retch.
Britney is a useless bitch.
She writes "poems" that do not scan
in stupid couplets, poetic Spam,
packaged, processed, canned and more.
Jesus Christ! A metaphor!
Holy shit, I tossed this off
in half the time it takes to cough
and it has more artistic merit
than she could dream of or inherit.
(Pretty slick that; I'll take a bow
and wrap this silly crap up now.)
Anyway: kill me now, before I retch.
Britney is a useless bitch.
hock: That was beautiful...
Weeping too openly to reply...
Jeff
June 21, 2003 Toronto, ON: SkyDome
July 1, 2004 Toronto, ON: Molson Amphitheatre
November 26, 2004 Toronto, ON: Air Canada Centre
June 24, 2006 Toronto, ON: Historic Fort York
May 10, 2007 Indianapolis, IN: The Vogue
July 14, 2011 Edmonton, AB: Northlands Festival Site
June 30, 2012 Niagara-on-the-Lake, ON: The Commons at Butler's Barracks
January 23, 2013 Edmonton, AB: Rexall Place
July 28, 2016 Edmonton, AB: Rexall Place
11-18-2004, 10:28 PM
prz Wrote:She is turning out to be a real special prize isnt she. I wonder how long till she hits rock bottom.
Didn't that happen when she married her "childhood friend" and then had it annuled 48 hours later?
11-18-2004, 10:38 PM
Skippy, that was hardcore :lol:
As for Britney's? :censored
That little piece has approximately as much intelligence in it as I have gouda in my lungs. Even though the majority of people posting their opinion in this thread have forgotten the simple fact the Britney's fans are 8-year-old girls and 70-year-old men, I must agree with the rest of this fridge that those mashed potatoes have gone bad. The fuzzy civilization of mold was a dead giveaway.
There's no feet, or beat, or measure, nothing. Just rhyming lines of varying length. Not that I'm saying poems have to fall into borders but she could've at least read a couple other poets (not much, just the more popular ones, but only for the sole purpose of dicouraging her from composing said poem).
If that ever gets published in a book along with other wondrous creations from the mind of Britney Spears, I will buy a gun. If that book then makes tons of money and is widely read by the populace and every poem in it is as horrible as the Turtle Island one, I will put that gun to my head.
As for Britney's? :censored
That little piece has approximately as much intelligence in it as I have gouda in my lungs. Even though the majority of people posting their opinion in this thread have forgotten the simple fact the Britney's fans are 8-year-old girls and 70-year-old men, I must agree with the rest of this fridge that those mashed potatoes have gone bad. The fuzzy civilization of mold was a dead giveaway.
There's no feet, or beat, or measure, nothing. Just rhyming lines of varying length. Not that I'm saying poems have to fall into borders but she could've at least read a couple other poets (not much, just the more popular ones, but only for the sole purpose of dicouraging her from composing said poem).
If that ever gets published in a book along with other wondrous creations from the mind of Britney Spears, I will buy a gun. If that book then makes tons of money and is widely read by the populace and every poem in it is as horrible as the Turtle Island one, I will put that gun to my head.
11-18-2004, 11:13 PM
retch and bitch don't rhyme, make like a mime and keep your mouth shut next time, not that i care about Britney Spears cuz you know that dumb cunt's got nothin between her ears, but i know a thing or two or three or four and just a little bit more about rhymin, it's all about precision and it's all about timin', you gotta be real, and it's gotta be hot, don't try to be something that you're not, cuz ya can't hold it down and you're gonna get caught, if you ask me to bring it then y'know it's gettin brought, and if you wanna start beef then you're gonna get shot, cuz i come out swingin', steady gun slingin', three pistols, fire in the hole, like Kyprios said "you better hold your soul", don't lose control, cuz i'm always rockin' and i let the heads roll, chew you up like skol, and then i spit, i always hit, never miss, cuz i'm the shit, and you just aint like piss, and before i go, yo, i got one more diss: all y'all are weak, and ya know ya can't fuck with this! UHHHHHHHHHH! REPRESENTIN' DA GCS! MINNOWHUT! GET IT CRUNK! WHUT! CRUNK! WHUT! CRUNK! WHUT! CRUNK! YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH! I'M RICK JAMES BIATCH!
11-18-2004, 11:14 PM
Good God man, is she actually taking credit for writing that?? hock: cratch:
Never mind 7 year-olds... damn monkeys can write better poems than that! :censored
hock: cratch: Never mind 7 year-olds... damn monkeys can write better poems than that! :censored
11-19-2004, 12:18 AM
The Darkest Canuck Wrote:retch and bitch don't rhyme,
make like a mime
and keep your mouth shut next time,
not that i care about Britney Spears
cuz you know that dumb cunt's got nothin between her ears,
but i know a thing or two or three or four
and just a little bit more about rhymin,
it's all about precision and it's all about timin',
you gotta be real, and it's gotta be hot,
don't try to be something that you're not,
cuz ya can't hold it down and you're gonna get caught,
if you ask me to bring it then y'know it's gettin brought,
and if you wanna start beef then you're gonna get shot,
cuz i come out swingin',
steady gun slingin',
three pistols, fire in the hole,
like Kyprios said "you better hold your soul",
don't lose control,
cuz i'm always rockin' and i let the heads roll,
chew you up like skol,
and then i spit,
i always hit,
never miss,
cuz i'm the shit,
and you just aint like piss,
and before i go,
yo, i got one more diss:
all y'all are weak,
and ya know ya can't f**k with this!
Holy shit! Those've gotta be the best rhymes I've read!
Poetry isn't just flowing, it's knowing when to say "when"
Y'see, there's a method to rap, yeah, anybody can rhyme
But the majority normally smack at the end of the line
Take a lesson from me, (I been rappin since ninety-eight)
Don't make it your profession; you'll be baggin at IGA
But I'm not a total asshole so I'll give you some tips
Before you get vocal analyze other raps (such as this)
Try wigglin your words into the middle of the verse
And stay away from that one-syllable shit you delivered
If ya wanna spit berserk, my shit'll put ya in a hearse
Cuz I play this game just a little too quick for beginners
11-19-2004, 09:45 AM
Though it pains me to invoke the name
of writers of such repute and fame,
I feel it behooves me to play upon
Platonic ideals of communication
For the philsopher himself is wont to have known
Society needs must control the art exposed
To propagate positive reinforcement from solely
Releasing to the world what helps them only
Poetry corrupts, and plays on superficial emotions
And conveys only contagion, not reason
That must be used to derive value from art;
Manipulation of the emotions otherwise the reader harms.
And of Aristotle, though he may have once concurred
Art imitates reality by transcribing actions through words
And therefore the capacity for reason at their helm,
But what we've seen of late reaches not for such realms
And bastardizes his noble praise.
And it may be said that Horace is treated much the same:
For having said a writer needs not be formally schooled,
The Princess mocks his judgments as a simple fool,
For Horace said also there are absolute extents
To which moral value can be found; and these are spent
By such superficialities as those come before
Which lend a laugh or lead one to snore.
For when this critic once had said that one must consider in narrative
The needs of the audience as well as one's imperative,
He has effectively cast out the scrawls of children and beasts
Who have no respect for Art of the very least.
In short, she mocks the most basic tenets
Of the great writers and thus does her own work discredit
For Reason must be employed to take away Truth
As Plato has said, decrying the fancy of youth,
And a history of the craft must be understood
Quoth Horace, in the name of all that in Art is good,
For one and all are much agreed:
There are limits on the kind of Art we need.
of writers of such repute and fame,
I feel it behooves me to play upon
Platonic ideals of communication
For the philsopher himself is wont to have known
Society needs must control the art exposed
To propagate positive reinforcement from solely
Releasing to the world what helps them only
Poetry corrupts, and plays on superficial emotions
And conveys only contagion, not reason
That must be used to derive value from art;
Manipulation of the emotions otherwise the reader harms.
And of Aristotle, though he may have once concurred
Art imitates reality by transcribing actions through words
And therefore the capacity for reason at their helm,
But what we've seen of late reaches not for such realms
And bastardizes his noble praise.
And it may be said that Horace is treated much the same:
For having said a writer needs not be formally schooled,
The Princess mocks his judgments as a simple fool,
For Horace said also there are absolute extents
To which moral value can be found; and these are spent
By such superficialities as those come before
Which lend a laugh or lead one to snore.
For when this critic once had said that one must consider in narrative
The needs of the audience as well as one's imperative,
He has effectively cast out the scrawls of children and beasts
Who have no respect for Art of the very least.
In short, she mocks the most basic tenets
Of the great writers and thus does her own work discredit
For Reason must be employed to take away Truth
As Plato has said, decrying the fancy of youth,
And a history of the craft must be understood
Quoth Horace, in the name of all that in Art is good,
For one and all are much agreed:
There are limits on the kind of Art we need.
11-19-2004, 12:34 PM
The romance is fading
Your love a dying flower
When your girl comes into take a shit
While your still in the shower.
Your love a dying flower
When your girl comes into take a shit
While your still in the shower.
11-19-2004, 12:43 PM
Oh my you guys are too much!
And yeah I actually think that my 5 year old god daughter could write something better than that.
And yeah I actually think that my 5 year old god daughter could write something better than that.
11-19-2004, 01:04 PM
Jessica Wrote:The romance is fading
Your love a dying flower
When your girl comes into take a shit
While your still in the shower.
:lol: :thumb:
True 'dat!
11-19-2004, 05:28 PM
I have no idea why I made this, but here's the result of ten minutes with a "text to speech" program:
http://www.badnewsonline.com/downloads/T...ivorce.wma
http://www.badnewsonline.com/downloads/T...ivorce.wma
11-20-2004, 12:29 AM
Seriously, isn't she old news by now? Her 15 minutes of fame has lasted longer than a PSAC coffee break...
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