Beer drinkin' Bear - Printable Version
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Beer drinkin' Bear - sherpahigh - 08-20-2004
haha... Sounds like a party version of Yogi...
Quote:Bear guzzles 36 beers, passes out at campground
Wednesday, August 18, 2004 Posted: 9:12 PM EDT (0112 GMT)
SEATTLE, Washington (Reuters) -- A black bear was found passed out at a campground in Washington state recently after guzzling down three dozen cans of a local beer, a campground worker said on Wednesday.
"We noticed a bear sleeping on the common lawn and wondered what was going on until we discovered that there were a lot of beer cans lying around," said Lisa Broxson, a worker at the Baker Lake Resort, 80 miles (129 km) northeast of Seattle.
The hard-drinking bear, estimated to be about two years old, broke into campers' coolers and, using his claws and teeth to open the cans, swilled down the suds.
It turns out the bear was a bit of a beer sophisticate. He tried a mass-market Busch beer, but switched to Rainier Beer, a local ale, and stuck with it for his drinking binge.
Wildlife agents chased the bear away, but it returned the next day, said Broxson.
They set a trap using as bait some doughnuts, honey and two cans of Rainier Beer. It worked, and the bear was captured for relocation.
I love how tried a couple different ones and stuck with his favourite. :lol:
- grooveless touque - 08-20-2004
I heard that on CBC...it's hilarious how they actually used his "favourite" beer in the trap! I can just picture them using Coors because it's all they've got, and the bear turns his nose up at it...they're smart you know...
- The Darkest Canuck - 08-20-2004
he's smarter than your average bear! :mrgreen:
- grooveless touque - 08-20-2004
it's a wonder it didn't occur to anyone to try a trap with a pickanick basket! :lol:
- chancellor - 08-20-2004
i read about this in the paper today and almost died laughing. great stuff, smart bear
- lord brazle - 08-21-2004
Yeah, ha ha, what a bear...
- VioletlightHeron - 08-23-2004
A Calgary Sun columnist had this to say about the beer swilling bear :lol: Hilarious article :mrgreen:
Beer drinking is going to the dogs
By Ted Byfield -- Calgary Sun
It was a profound relief to me last week to discover that a 500-pound black bear gets dead drunk on 36 cans of American beer.
Reluctant as I am to burden readers with my personal problems, we have a dog, you see, with what we suspect is a serious drinking problem.
We're not sure, and we don't like to raise the issue with him judgmentally because he's very sensitive and that kind of personal accusation could hurt him deeply and make him much worse.
Nevertheless, it's impossible to tell when he's had enough.
He would go on drinking all night if you let him.
But just where do you cut him off?
Breathalyzers are out of the question.
That's the problem, and when that story came in last week from Washington state about the bear discovered sleeping it off on the lawn of the Baker Lake Resort, after stealing and consuming 36 cans of Rainier beer, it gave us some indication of an animal's limit.
If the bear, at 500 pounds, passes out after 36 beers, then Texas -- that's the name of the dog -- who weighs about 50 pounds, should never be allowed more than two.
There are other factors of course.
For one, Texas, despite his name, does not drink American beer, which is weaker than Canadian.
He regards it as insipid, no bite, no body.
It tastes, as they say, as though it has been drunk once before, and by a horse.
But then again, Texas drinks only light Canadian beer, chiefly because that 's all there is in the house.
So perhaps the two factors balance off.
Second, there may be significant differences between the alcohol disability limits of dogs and bears.
Maybe dogs can hold it better, maybe not.
How are we to know?
What concerns us, however, is that there have been disturbing signs with Texas.
We left an open case of Bud Light on the floor which Texas discovered.
He removed a can and bit into it.
After the beer spurted out, he lapped it up off the floor.
He was going for a second one when he was caught.
I spoke pretty severely to him.
I explained to him that I have several grandsons now in their 20s, and keeping them in beer when they visit is expensive enough.
I didn't want to have to keep the damn dog in beer as well.
He seemed contrite, but that means nothing.
He specializes in contrite, particularly when caught stealing.
A few days later, another can was missing.
We found it in the yard where he had carted it before opening it.
That's sneak-drinking, of course, one of the signs they tell you to look for.
So I sat down and talked to him seriously.
I told him we didn't want him doing this off by himself in the yard.
The neighbours would see him; there would be gossip.
The Byfields' dog is a lush, etc. If he wanted a drink before dinner, he should simply come and ask for it, and share it socially.
There was nothing to be ashamed of.
Even so, he must learn to limit himself, and if he found that he couldn't do this, then he must face the fact that he is one of those dogs that shouldn't drink at all.
I don't think he ever really accepted this.
His response was to sneeze and stalk off, something I've since recognized as an act of mild defiance.
It means, "Yeah, right."
Anyway, that night before dinner, I poured a can of beer into a bowl and put it on the floor.
He slurped it down in about 15 seconds and promptly asked for another.
I consulted my wife.
"At a dollar-and-a-half a can, you have to ask?" she said.
"Tell him 'NO.' "
My wife is sometimes narrow and intolerant like this.
I remember when I used to dip my finger in the whisky and let the cat lick it off, she became abusive.
My wife, I mean, not the cat.
But the cat always refused a second.
Needless to say, it was a female cat, eminently prudent.
In any event, I sometimes give the dog a second, but never a third.
Which now seems wise, given the experience of that bear.
- chris - 08-23-2004
Those SUN writers have it made in the shade, getting paid to write stuff like this!
Thanks for posting it.
- K-Town Lassie - 08-23-2004
I thought the Sun article was hysterical! We could use some giggles around here lately. As Chris said, thanks for posting it.
- joshwayy - 08-23-2004
Great stuff, my room-mate in college use to give his dog bong hits...could've written a novel about that. Maggie (the dog's name) would have one rolled when he got home...This article is no better however than an thread with some of the leading posters around here lately...would make Dave Barry envious of wit.