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CanuckCourage - 11-05-2004
Stephen Dame Wrote:I've had everything from political arguments, engaging conversations, new friendships created, old friends re-acquainted and some really funny exchanges on this forum.
I don't consider anyone an "asshole," nor have I seen any specific "cliques" excluding folks from discussions... I would hope newbies don't feel they have to "earn" there way into the forum.
The common interest should be enough to make everybody feel welcome, and if sometimes things get heated, it's only because passion occasionally trumps reason.
I think Lance and the Mod's have done a wondeful job of creating a welcoming atmosphere for newbies and us crazy, Hip-is-our-crack fans.
I couldn't agree more. I also agree with Chris and Neil about the Ignore function, it just seems ignorant to use it. Nothing wrong with disagreements, and nothing is gained or learned from sticking your head in the sand. I think being ignored, or not replied to speaks more to the person that's doing it than the ignoreee. (is that a word ?) Some speak out of passion, some out of jest, and often people are misinterpreted as PurposelessPlay mentioned. In the end none of us are infallible, we are not perfect and I don't think anyone deserves the "Asshole" tag. Kind of a redundant post, but that's my 2 cents..
Mark
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Billy - 11-05-2004
I wasn't going to wade into this but what the hell. I have seen newbies "ganged-up" on quite a few times on here and often thought it was quite out of line. Many times a simple private message would have been much more diplomatic and considerate.
I have also noticed the "clique" mentality present here. It isn't anything that is prevelant or overbearing, but it is certainly present. I don't know that it's anyones fault, but perhaps just a natural phenomenon when people gather in groups, whether online or off.
Asshole is probably a little harsh...agreed.
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tigerthelion - 11-05-2004
Who are the cliques? I've got some ideas but I'd like to hear other people's opinions on what people are forming these cliques. NAMES! NAMES! NAMES!
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lord brazle - 11-05-2004
tigerthelion Wrote:Who are the cliques? I've got some ideas but I'd like to hear other people's opinions on what people are forming these cliques. NAMES! NAMES! NAMES!
I'll start a clique. Everybody's invited.
Minimum requirement; you must have heard at least one Tragically Hip song (not completely, maybe only the chorus)
and you must be a member of the Hipbase.
That's it!
Fantastic!
Send me $56.99 for your membership
and I'll send you your official Hipbase Lord Brazle Club Cheese Slice
with your name on it...
it's expert craftsmanship...
big black marker, baby...
(Disclaimer; don't really send me any money; I'm joking.
And I don't have that many cheese slices in my house...
well, I do, but I'm not gonna give them all away...
well maybe for 56 bucks...
but no, don't send me any money)
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scottitude - 11-05-2004
Billy Wrote:I wasn't going to wade into this but what the hell...seen newbies "ganged-up" on quite a few times...a simple private message would have been much more diplomatic and considerate...I have also noticed the "clique" mentality present here...
I won't go as far as asking anyone to name names, but I think some actual examples may help clarify things. If the issue is two or more members with similar perspectives that oppose another individual's point of view is "ganging up", then it's a problem of perception. In some recent election discussions, several of us (myself included) had a passionate discourse. One "side" was initially supported by Horrible Esthete and until the discussion dragged on, few members joined his side of the "argument".
He may have felt "ganged up" on, but nobody set out with that intention; his position was so firm and for the most part so well stated that it obviously inspired those on the other end of the political spectrum. I can't speak for everyone involved in that discussion, but I'm confident that at least a couple of us that argued heavily "against" him were inspired by the quality of his argument "against" us, and I don't think it did any lasting damage. Everyone's entitled to feel how they feel and believe what they believe whether it's politically, personally, or whatever. If others share the same or opposite perspective and join the discussion, that's life, not a group effort towards a common opponent.
On the other hand, if a new member's first post is "where can I download music", they appear to be less interested in what they can bring to the community and more interested in how much they can take from it. Imagine a stranger waliking in your door and going straight to the fridge saying "got any beer?"...will you welcome them or say "dude, WTF are you doing?".
I occasionally visit an unrelated forum where there is a
specific thread that newbies
must use to post an "introduction". If the old-timers don't like their introduction, they're severely ridiculed by about thirty different people; if they post in another thread without posting an introduction, they're told (by about fifty people) to GTF back to the "Newbie Thread and post an introduction, you POS F'ng newbie!"
If new members followed well established guidelines that permeate
every forum and discussion group I've ever seen (read the FAQs, lurk for a while to get a feel for the community before you post, search before you start a new thread, etc.) They may feel more like they're in the "clique", instead of oustide it, and they're less likely to get fifteen replies that say "read the FAQ" or "do a search".
Hell, I lurked here for the better part of a year and since I started posting I've never felt like an outsider. I've probably pissed a person off here and there, but it was never intentional and I've never been mean-spirited although on occasion, others may have percieved me to be. Still, I feel comfortable sharing thoughts, gaining insight, and indirectly getting to know people I never would have met otherwise.
I'm pretty sure that we're all able to take constructive criticism, so if anyone can provide a couple of concrete examples of a mob mentality, those who played a part in creating that perception could certainly grow from it.
~Scott
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Stephen Dame - 11-06-2004
lord brazle Wrote:tigerthelion Wrote:Who are the cliques? I've got some ideas but I'd like to hear other people's opinions on what people are forming these cliques. NAMES! NAMES! NAMES!
Send me $56.99 for your membership
and I'll send you your official Hipbase Lord Brazle Club Cheese Slice
with your name on it...
it's expert craftsmanship...
big black marker, baby...
MAKE MINE SWISS!!!!
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cferneyh - 11-06-2004
CanuckCourage Wrote:I also agree with Chris and Neil about the Ignore function, it just seems ignorant to use it. Nothing wrong with disagreements, and nothing is gained or learned from sticking your head in the sand. I think being ignored, or not replied to speaks more to the person that's doing it than the ignoreee. (is that a word ?) Some speak out of passion, some out of jest, and often people are misinterpreted as PurposelessPlay mentioned. In the end none of us are infallible, we are not perfect and I don't think anyone deserves the "Asshole" tag. Kind of a redundant post, but that's my 2 cents..
Mark
I use the ignore function, but I only use it on one guy who - in
my opinion - is only here to insult people and get reactions. And no, despite the fact that we disagree 95% of the time I'm not talking about Stephen Dame ( :lol: ).
I look at it this way - my wife has a friend who is married to the most obnoxious SOB I've ever met (for example, according to him it is no big deal to drink and drive, as long as you take the "back roads" home :roll: ). Rather than call this clown on his erroneous statements and get in debate after debate after debate, I just nod and agree. Its much easier to deal with him that way. In a way it is a form of ignoring him.
I've got no problem with getting into debates with folks who may not agree with my opinion, but when I continuously read posts that are meant to incite, goad, and irritate (like the one guy on my ignore list), it detracts from the time I do spend here. And given how great 99.9% of the people here are, I don't want to be driven away because one clown is wasting my time. :thumb:
- thipfan73 - 11-06-2004
There are assholes on this board. I have had heated arguments with a few people on this board where I was just presenting my point and they just kept slamming away on me. Didn't matter what I THOUGHT it was all about what THEY thought.
There are three people on this board I have on ignore. Two of them are the same person, one of them is a person whom I gave a second chance to but after less that 24 hours was so frustrated with the person I had to put them back on ignore.
Otherwise, nobody else is on ignore. I can appreciate strong opinions. I can appreciate a good debate but it's about presentation.
PS: mostly directed at Chris.
Do you think I'm stupid enough to say who I think is an asshole? Can you imagine what that would open me up for? I'm not going to ruin my good standing here at the hip base and no I do not regret or take back saying there are assholes here. They are not the people who have been around and I get along with. I have been attacked on here and I have had people jump down my throat for the tinniest little things.
EDIT: From bigblackie's post on.
<!-- m --><a class="postlink" href="http://www.hipbase.com/forum/viewtopic.php?t=4439&postdays=0&postorder=asc&start=15">http://www.hipbase.com/forum/viewtopic. ... c&start=15</a><!-- m -->
I rest my case.
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CanuckCourage - 11-06-2004
cferneyh Wrote:I use the ignore function, but I only use it on one guy who - in my opinion - is only here to insult people and get reactions. And no, despite the fact that we disagree 95% of the time I'm not talking about Stephen Dame ( :lol: )
Good point, I see what you mean, never considered that angle.
thipfan73 Wrote:Some people can be WAAAY too sensitive around here and sometimes they can be downright mean
I'm not saying this because I feel like argueing, but did you ever consider that maybe you're the one being way too sensitive ?
thipfan73 Wrote:PS: mostly directed at Chris.
Do you think I'm stupid enough to say who I think is an asshole? Can you imagine what that would open me up for? I'm not going to ruin my good standing here at the hip base and no I do not regret or take back saying there are assholes here. They are not the people who have been around and I get along with. I have been attacked on here and I have had people jump down my throat for the tinniest little things.
EDIT: From bigblackie's post on.
<!-- m --><a class="postlink" href="http://www.hipbase.com/forum/viewtopic.php?t=4439&postdays=0&postorder=asc&start=15">http://www.hipbase.com/forum/viewtopic. ... c&start=15</a><!-- m -->
I rest my case.
Goodbye all.
I read this thread and you clearly overreacted. At least in my opinion.
How to put this...If you have a beef with someone, take it up with them, PM them, or debate on the forum, don't PM other people naming names and reasons why you don't like them without giving them a chance to defend themselves. It's manipulative and cheap and in my opinion unacceptable. If you want respect, earn it, and most importantly take it up with that person, or at least allow them to defend. This person may argue vehemently with you, but did you consider that maybe it's because they aren't attacking you, but maybe because it's truly what they believe ? If it is what they believe, then they have every right to express their opinion as do you.
Mark
- thipfan73 - 11-06-2004
If opinions could fly this place would be an airport.
I respect opinions, always have. I come from a long line of strong pigheaded women and I inhereted my Father's big mouth, temper and my Grandmother and my father's love of debate. Sometimes tiny things can set me off. I'm living in a really bad situation. I love my boyfriend but we're so damned poor it's pathetic and finding jobs this time of the year here is next to impossible. We're so poor I was refusing to go to the hip show at one point, but David insisted I go and I had people depending on me. I'm starting a new med for my depression, I just had a birthday on thursday which few people acknowledged(sp?) in my close circle of online friends. I'm so stressed out lately I'm pratically numb. I have been living like this since Feb.
I did send a few pms saying who I thought was one of the assholes on here, was I wrong? I don't think so. It was a way to get my point across without having to post it here and have that person jump down my throat. If I think that person is an asshole, I am not going to give them a chance to defend themselves because time and time again they have proven they are an asshole. I am constantly giving people chances and if there are assholes on there there are a few on here and even if I say they are assholes it's my opinion and I have a right to it.
The ignore function is something I help get instated. I thank highwaygirl28 for it. I was being constantly harrassed by a forum user and I was not over reacting. Jen agreed with me.
If I've been out of line I'm sorry. I apologize, however, there are days I will fight till I'm blue in the face. Today was one of those days.
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CanuckCourage - 11-06-2004
thipfan73 Wrote:If opinions could fly this place would be an airport.
I respect opinions, always have. I come from a long line of strong pigheaded women and I inhereted my Father's big mouth, temper and my Grandmother and my father's love of debate. Sometimes tiny things can set me off. I'm living in a really bad situation. I love my boyfriend but we're so damned poor it's pathetic and finding jobs this time of the year here is next to impossible. We're so poor I was refusing to go to the hip show at one point, but David insisted I go and I had people depending on me. I'm starting a new med for my depression, I just had a birthday on thursday which few people acknowledged(sp?) in my close circle of online friends. I'm so stressed out lately I'm pratically numb. I have been living like this since Feb.
I did send a few pms saying who I thought was one of the assholes on here, was I wrong? I don't think so. It was a way to get my point across without having to post it here and have that person jump down my throat. If I think that person is an asshole, I am not going to give them a chance to defend themselves because time and time again they have proven they are an asshole. I am constantly giving people chances and if there are assholes on there there are a few on here and even if I say they are assholes it's my opinion and I have a right to it.
The ignore function is something I help get instated. I thank highwaygirl28 for it. I was being constantly harrassed by a forum user and I was not over reacting. Jen agreed with me.
If I've been out of line I'm sorry. I apologize, however, there are days I will fight till I'm blue in the face. Today was one of those days.
Opinions are good, they encourage growth.
I feel for your problems Wendy, but we all have them at one time or another, life isn't easy and you need to fight to be happy and at peace sometimes..The point about the PM's is you are not giving the accused a chance to defend themselves, whether you consider them to be assholes or not, you need to imagine yourself in that position, people PM'ing others about what an asshole you were, would you not want the opportunity to defend yourself ? I don't consider you an asshole, I just think you need to be a little more understanding of other peoples opinions, they may disagree with you, it doesn't mean they have it in for you, just means you don't see eye to eye. If someone was harrassing you, I don't have a problem with the ignore function, I just see no reason to utilize it for myself.
Mark
- thipfan73 - 11-06-2004
how about we just chalk it up to PMS and put this all behind us?
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tommygunn - 11-06-2004
thipfan73 Wrote:how about we just chalk it up to PMS and put this all behind us?
Apology accepted!
:lol:
- thipfan73 - 11-06-2004
tommygunn Wrote:thipfan73 Wrote:how about we just chalk it up to PMS and put this all behind us?
Apology accepted!
:lol:
Thank you :lol:
That made me smile. I REALLY needed that.
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CanuckCourage - 11-06-2004
thipfan73 Wrote:how about we just chalk it up to PMS and put this all behind us?
No hard feelings, one the things us guys are lucky not to endure. Along with many other things women face in life.